I was born and brought up in a Christian
Family. My parents were very pious. They used to go to Church every Sunday.
They read the Bible every day. They brought me up in very strict traditional
discipline. But I did not see anything more special in our family than
in anyone else's. We had everything the same as others had. We had money
and status, but lacked peace all the way. I was just following a religion
because it was my tradition, and was living a dual life. I too was very
pious in my church; yet on the other hand I wanted to be very pleasing
to my friends, so I did whatever they wanted me to do. Slowly I found
that my life was becoming more and more miserable, until there came
a time when I was lonely, desolate, and peaceless.
I had money, status, fame, intelligence
(I was admired by fellow students as a very brilliant person), yet there
came a time when I thought that I might commit suicide, but could not
take that step due to fear. A peculiar fear was gripping my soul: while
I was sleeping, I would suddenly wake up and think that a train was
going over my head. While I was on the road I would suddenly be thinking
that some vehicle was going to come and crash into me. I did not know
why this fear was gripping me.
My life was going from worse to worst,
and it looked like there was no solution to it. But one day I was forced
to attend a Christian Leadership Camp that was being conducted by Campus
Crusade for Christ of India. I went there unwillingly. There, a person
by the name of Eppan was speaking, and he said that fear and peacelessness
come because of sins, and that Jesus can change your life and can take
you out of fear. It seemed like he was speaking directly to me, but
I said to myself that I was a Christian from my childhood and knew Jesus,
loved Jesus. I went to church, though I did not see anything special...so
what else did I need to do? Then I heard the speaker saying that if
you confess your sins to the Lord Jesus Christ and ask forgiveness,
then He will forgive you and forget about your sins. He will make you
holy. I prayed to the Lord that He might forgive me and make me whole.
From that moment my life began to change
and within a short period of time I noticed that my attitudes and desires
were changing toward holiness. I received joy, peace and an unspeakable
happiness. My old habits were no longer there. My fear was gone. My
life became glorious, as I experienced tremendous change.
And as it is written in 2 Cor 5:17
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things
have passed away; behold, all things have become new." He made
me new. He can change your life too. He can make you whole too. He can
help you out of your desperation too, if you give Jesus a try. He will
do what no other person can do in your life.